There is much beauty in this world.... There are people who are just as selfish as a flower- they bloom, make peoples lives brighter, bring a sense of success and fulfillment to anyone passing by, exhilarate all animals, tingles almost all senses of anyone in its presence and then, slowly and quietly dies off, most of the times unnoticed. Then there are the kind of people that never even realize that spring has come and gone and are still focused on the winter and the dreary clouds it brings, wallowing in their own sorrows making not only theirs but others lives miserable as well. I fell in the latter category for the longest time.
I recently came to realize that there are flowers all around me! Worst part is- they ARE in the brightest of colors and in full bloom. I notice these flowers, but passed them off as an annoyance because I thought it hid other things from my focus. I noticed these flowers but I constantly wanted to know what was beyond the flowers; wondering what God wanted me to see and never once stopped to think maybe He intended for me to see these flowers and rejoice them. Real issue? I focused on the wrong things...I'd see flowers, then I'd see the setting it is in, and pass it off as hindrance or a roadblock.
Due to past experiences I have trouble trusting anyone- which is a problem, but not a big one per se- it did become one when I realized (as I write this piece) I was at a point where I could barely see any positives in anyone at all. I saw positives, but I automatically focused on the negatives. The negatives would irritate me so much that I'd deliberate over and over and I'd end up with a migraine. Enough exposure to the same negative aspect with one person, my brain automatically associated the person with a migraine and being around that person became excruciating.
Is it possible that because the world is such a cold place that these flowers seem to die quicker? That they seem to come fewer and farther in between now? Maybe. But that's not the point, is it? It's not the quantity its the quality of ones life that makes the difference. For example, I've been bitching about my colleague day in and day out. You'd think she was the epitome of a moron, an accident waiting to happen...I was so rilled up in all her "wrongs" that I forgot what a beautiful person lies beneath the roughness, beneath her "old traditional ways," beneath the woman who "takes forever to do one minuscule project". She's caring-genuinely caring and she thinks about you even when she's done with work. Occasionally, she'd cook for me and my boss just because. Not to get a raise, not to gain anything- just because she thought we'd like to have some. She does all these little things that come to her like second nature that leave me stunned. She has offered me more than most, but did I ever once stop and think "wow! this person is...something!!" Nope.
My MENTOR is this wonderful woman who has managed to raise a family and be a successful business and career woman, raising 2 kids who absolutely adore her and a husband who fought cancer not too long ago and won. This woman lost a best friend to cancer and 3 months later received news that her husband of 12 some years was suffering from the same disease. She has helped with charitable organizations, volunteered for umpteen charities and has had more social events at her house than Lindsay Lohan's done shots...I cannot fathom how one could single handedly manage every single aspect of her life so well and yet remain a size 6.
I am in no way saying that the said people are perfect in every way. Each has their own faults but the goods outweigh the bads in immeasurable units. In the end, each IS perfect in their own way. I know each one will disappoint me at one point or another. That's what humans do. You fall, and you rise and shine brighter. People need to focus on the results of the downs than the branch that tripped them down and world that didn't warn him/her of said branch ;)
The world is a beautiful place. The world is also cold and hard. It depends on how YOU choose to see it.You get what you put in... So I just made a pact with myself. I will surround myself with the most amazing people you will ever meet. I speculate the key is not that I have to hunt the future saints of this world and surround myself with them, but be the kind of person that makes people want to be amazing when around me. I want to somehow manage to take the best quality in each person I keep close and accentuate those values. I already trust few, and expect almost nothing from anyone unless I have let them in my 'inner circle.' I don't plan on embellishing anyone so much as to come off as a sycophant, but theres an amazing delicate balance of accentuating and encouraging truth and flat out ass kissing and that can be achieved with little skill,time and effort. So Good Luck to me!! =)
P.S. My Moto Q came in the mail the very next day and I love it! :-D
Random rant*
Another failed relationship
Another fleeting feeling
Another heart broken
This time it was my fault.
*No this isn't about me or any of my late, or current relationship...just came to me so I 'jotted' it down
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